The moment I woke up today. I saw stars. Dizzy is what I felt the moment I got up. Looking at the time. It's like 5pm already. No choice. Got to drag myself out of bed.
I feel cold. Yet it's such a hot weather. I think I must have gotten the flu bug.
Been having nightmares last night. Ain't no surprise if depression decide to come back and haunt me. Because I've been thinking way too much recently. I feel tight in my chest. Wanted to let go of it but can't.
Guess I must have been staying too long at home. It's been 2 weeks plus since I last take a walk to the outside world.
I just feel very troubled. Troubled over what? I asked myself this question. But I can't find the answer.
Just want to spend more time in bed. Computer is making me sick. Eww. Virtual world sucks.
I don't dare to think. Luckily my medical appointment is arriving in 10 days time. Phew for that.
Wanted to get a job. But on the other hand thinking of what happened last time. I do not wish to work again. Maybe going to get enough rest for this whole year.
Nobody ever appreciate what I've done. What's the use of me chiong-ing so much for company and when they earn enough I got fired? Not fair.
Still feeling not very well when I typed this blog at 10.30pm. Nobody's online. Nobody will even notice if I did not online for a day. I guess nobody will even notice if I'm dead.
Can someone just care for me?
I want to escape. Not into the virtual world now. But to Malaysia. Maybe I should go and relax a bit before my medical appointment. If not I'll hear my Doctor Melvin screaming again.
"Why why why you lidat again ar?! Give me some face leh. Recover faster leh please."
-_-