I'm coughing and coughing till I can't take it anymore. It's been tons of months since my old sickness acted up on me. I thought it will be all over, but nah, it's just my wishful thinking.
Been ill for two days. Shrunk 3 kgs and missed out the fun outing on monday. But hey, without me, they seems so much happier. Maybe my parents are right. I'm just a burden to my friends and family. Without me, it's all gonna be more fun and carefree. I'm just like a patient, an useless person to be exact. Not able to fly high, no matter how hard I tried, I will just fell, fell hardly.
I'm getting so sick of myself. Sick of my life, sick of my illness. Can you just go away, forever? Don't bother me anymore, please. 15 years and still counting, I'm already sick of you. Aren't you sick of me yet? When are you going to leave me in peace?
Still coughing madly now. Guess I will need a doc later. Don't dare to show up at Dr Neo's clinic anymore. Still remembered how I chase him after a chopper. Yes, you never read it wrongly. I chase after my family docter with a chopper. Just because he gave me the wrong medicine, and I thought he wanted to poison me or something. My mental is screwed up last time. I told ya I'm a mad person. Accept the facts. Be gladly to accept it. I'm just mad. Mentally mad.
Mom said I look like an old hag with my long hair. I'm gonna cut it short, real short. Maybe I'm just suitable to being a guy. I'm just so not a lady. I'm raise up as a guy. So yea, no dress or skirts for me now. I just hate being a girl. A sickful girl.
Danny sms me on monday asking me to go otherwise he will get bullied by the girls. I'm tired, really tired of so call taking care of those younger ones. Trying to be a selfish me. As selfish as possible. Not wanting to care about anybody's stuffs anymore. But when Darren msg me just now that he's in a bad mood. I know, I just need a good friend, so he will also be there for me whenever I'm in a bad mood too.
Coughing and coughing. When will all these sickish nightmare ends? Or I shall end it myself? Forever? Haiz.