Don't know how should I type it tonight. Just got myself a very shocking news. Well, not any new news actually. But don't know why I'm that shock when it came from uncle's mouth. Perhaps I know it can be confirmed when it's said by uncle. What should I do? Uncle tell me what should I do? I'm very confused now. Should I continue escaping or face it?
Following my jie I called him uncle too. He really can be a nice person to talk to. No wonder so many xiao mei meis like him. Got another shock too when uncle told me he's *Iknowwho*. I was like WHAT? Know that person and uncle so long. Today just know they're both the same person. Is like wth. But it's not too shocking for me compare to that news. Maybe I'm in the wrong too at first. Over play with fire till it burns me. Just like jie and him.
If only I'm allowed to work in shanghai. Uncle F got me a job there. To do some paper works in an office. The office is kind of a school. Don't know how to explain it. But my parents don't allow. Salmon don't allow too. Saying I'm not familiar there. Later got cheated. Don't worry. Uncle F can be trusted. Unlike that someone. Whom I'm not sure if I should trust or not to. What is he after etc. I don't even know. Oh yah. Nearly get murder by my doctor who came chasing me with questions regarding salmon. Spare me doc.
I feel like taking up the challenge. Cos of the salary and contract they're offering? Around $3000 per month plus I'm allowed to continue my studies. You won't know how much I wish to study. Although I know it's not the right job for me. Only allowed to come back per 2 months for a couple of days. I know this kind of job is not suitable for me. But can't my parents and him give me support? I'm not young anymore. Time to plan for my future.
I don't want to hurt a best friend. No way am I losing this friend. I don't want to give in too. So vexed. And I know I shouldn't escape anymore. Uncle better get me some news soon. Don't know what's wrong with me. I can cried cos of this topic. Just cos I don't know what to do. Such a failure. Don't dare to accept it. Sorry if I've hurt you in any way. My bf. Best friend.
Think I should just go out and rot just like today. Rot till late night then come back. Smoke and drink to my fill again. Man, I'm so vexed. Mei hurry come back. I need you to complain to. Listening to JJ Lin's wu jun de si nian is nice when you're facing such a problem. The problem plus the shanghai matter can totally drained off my energy and brain cells. I need some time alone for now. Time to think. It's time to settle it once and for all.