Sunday, April 22, 2007

Stress Kills

Stress, stress, stress. Till I nearly can't hang on at work. I'm so tired and disappointed in myself. Thinking of giving up soon. 4 mp3 promoters including me today. Jenny, Alex, Nas and me. They've all got at least 3 pieces sales each. Me? Only 2. Some more the other 1 is Nas help me sell it. I'm so shi bai. So wtf am I still staying there? Make myself more embarrassed?

No appetite to eat much. Whole day only ate a mac chicken meal. I really don't understand why is this happening? Been trying to chiong. Worked till 10pm some more. But yet nothing seems to go right. Sebes asked me not to give up. The others asked me to change another company or brand.

No, I can't do this to Vincent. The only reason I'm staying on is because of him. He's one of the kindest guy alive. Though he's timid sometimes and won't know how to stand up for his staffs. But he's really a nice in-charge. It's my luck to work with him. Thinking if I should change my promoter job to admin. Go our company to work. Maybe I'm really not suitable to be promoter.

Already giving up on myself and my brand. Totally lost my confidence. Wonder who and what can help me to gain my confidence back. But am really grateful for all those who encouraged, comforted me and helped me. Perhaps I should learn how to walk on my own soon. Time to stand up on my feet without any help.

Sorry, I lied to a lot of people. I did smoke. But I'm not a heavy smoker. Please pardon me. And understand that I'm suffering from stress. You can choose to believe it or not to. Choose to befriend me still or end the friendship. Sorry buddy. I shouldn't have lied.

I need to believe in myself once again. Can I?