I was suppose to show up at Malaysia for my grandma's birthday. End up I didn't go as usual. I think I'm a bad granddaughter. She really doted on me lots. But I can't even go for her birthday celebration. Just because I don't wish to let my relatives ask about this and that.
They might ask about that guy, my work and him.
Already at this point. Why should I still care about my face? I don't know, I really don't know.
Looking at the pictures they took and the smile on my grandma's face, I felt better. Maybe it's good that I didn't turn up. What if I go and something bad happen, like I can't control my emotions or something and upset everyone. Won't that be worse?
I admit it's already been around one whole year since I last visited her. Due to my work and those bad stuffs which happened. I think I should really visit her after my medical appointment this month end. Since I'm already under 3 types of medication everyday, I don't think anything bad will happen right?
Going out with Zenn tomorrow. I hope it will be a good day. I'm going to take lots of photos and send some over to let him see. Maybe I ought to bring my camera out tomorrow. Although it's a lousy one. Perhaps we can still go window shopping and maybe catch a movie after that.
I shouldn't keep myself at home everyday shouldn't I?
Guess so...